These Present Troubles

Jesus is clearly a champion of the poor, hungry and needy. Yet when a woman pours a year’s salary worth of perfume on him, and the disciples criticize this move as being too extravagant (“That should have been sold and the money given the poor”), Jesus says this: “You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me.” (John 12:8)

Jesus isn’t being callous and uncaring about the poor. He’s being realistic. This world is always going to have problems. There will always be trouble. You’ll always have something that needs fixing. Don’t use that as an excuse not to worship God.

I have several issues that I’ve been presenting to God repeatedly for a couple years, basically crying and saying ‘fix it!’

But God hasn’t snapped his fingers and made all the issues go away. What I have come to realize is that if God solves my current problems, I’ll just end up having different ones.

He wants me to seek him, follow him, worship him where I am. Israel wasn’t told to worship God once they got to the promised land. They were called to do it in the desert, before they ever got their promised inheritance.

If, no - check that, WHEN we have problems; health, money, relationships, school, career - we can’t get to the attitude that once God makes it better, we’ll really do a better job of loving him and living for him.

Jesus said that it’s okay, not to ignore the poor or forget about them, but to prioritize them. God is more important that our present troubles. We can lavish our love and affections on him, even from a place of brokenness and imperfections. Heck, what could be better than genuine worship in the midst of situations that try to rob you of your passion?

Jesus even says in John 16:33 that we are going to have trouble in this world. But that we should take heart, be encouraged. Because he is greater, and it’s all going to be okay in the final analysis.

God cares for the poor, desperate and needy; and he wants us to care as well. But if we are going to help restore this world, we’ve got to keep our priorities straight.

We need not feel guilty about giving God the best of us.

Asking Better Questions

Let me let you in on a little secret about me: my favorite questions are the ones that there’s no easy answer for, and possibly no definite conclusion to be reached at all. It’s because I got bored of treating the bible like a textbook a long time ago.

I’m not trying to win bible trivia at group meetings or prepare myself for the scan-tron test God gives everyone to see if they are allowed into heaven.

Here’s the kind of questions that I love :

Why does God change his mind in some places in the bible (e.g. Hezekiah, not destroying Israel after Moses pleads with him), but not in others (Sodom and Gomorrah, Not letting Moses into the promised land, Not removing the thorn in Paul’s flesh)?

Why does God allow so much evil and suffering in this world?

Why does God make it so easy for people to ignore him?

Why did God create Lucifer?

Why did God create humanity knowing they would fall?

What is God’s non-linear reality like?

Oh yeah, where does God come from? (That one makes my head hurt if I think about it for more than a couple minutes.)

I can give some answers, to varying degrees of satisfaction, to most of these questions. But most of it is speculation. So perhaps it’s unhealthy to ask questions like these.

Paul said that in the next life, we’ll get all the answers we want. So better to just ignore the mysteries until then, right?

I disagree. Here’s why I think there’s value in wrestling with “unanswerable questions”:

I heard a story about a guy who worked for Bose (you know, the speaker/headphone people). He had an idea for a new product. This product would simulate the sound in a large building, such as a stadium or auditorium, and let somebody hear exactly what music or talking would sound like in any seat of the stadium coming out of a sound system. By giving this device the blueprints for a building that wasn’t yet constructed, they could test and see whether they needed to make adjustments to maximize the experience of people in the seats. They could also test the performance of a large scale sound system before investing the money into it.

This guy pitched the idea to the head of Bose. The president of the company didn’t think this guy had any shot of making this product. But he gave the guy the green light anyways. When asked later why he would let somebody undertake an expensive project when he didn’t even believe it could be done, the president said that the guy had so much passion and enthusiasm for it, he just couldn’t say no. And the president figured that they would probably learn things from the project that would be useful to other projects, enough so that they could probably recoup their investment.

When I spend time pondering questions that are far greater than I can fully grasp, I may not get “the answer” to that question. But I often gain insights and understanding along the way. The Holy Spirit may reveal something to me that I had never considered before.

The best questions, while maybe not having a final, direct answer, lead to other insights.

God has all the answers. He doesn’t need us to figure anything out so we can explain it to him. But I do think he’s looking for people that will ask questions.  Because only those who seek will ever find.

Mundane Mediocrity

It’s easy to see God in the extraordinary. It’s easy to cry out to him in desperation.

But how can we make our relationship with God part of everyday, normal life?

Here’s what I don’t like about facebook: it makes people feel like their lives are boring and uninteresting, but that everybody else has a ton of exciting/interesting stuff happening.

In reality, this is untrue. It’s an illusion. When you have 500 people who only post something that is noteworthy, it just seems like everybody else is busy and doing stuff. Most people are just making it through a boring day, same as you are.

But people usually don’t post things like: “Just heated up lunch in the microwave. Back to my desk for another 3 hours now.”

The challenge of being a true Christian for a typical American (in my opinion) is seeking God when everything is status quo. We don’t really need God to meet our dietary needs: we have plenty of food. Most of us are normally in pretty good health, or we go to the doctor and get medication if we need it. We’re not generally in danger of being attacked.

The things that are trying to compete for our attention are TV, facebook, games, etc.

Things that are passive and fun and easy.

Seeking God is none of those things. It takes time and energy and effort. You have to wrestle with your thoughts and emotions and focus.

If we only look for God in the ‘big events’ in life, I think we will miss the times when he is a still, small whisper. And in my experience, those are the words of life that prepare us to handle the big events.

God is still God even when life is a grind. We must resist the temptation to check out when everything within us wants to do exactly that.

Nobody likes plowing the fields, but without that work, you don’t see a harvest.

The Story

I’ve been thinking lately how much our lives are like a story. Stories, at least the good ones, take time to tell. They unfold, pieces at a time.

I read The Hunger Games a little over a week ago. I enjoyed it. I thought it was a well written book that told an interesting story.

The first page didn’t explain anything about the hunger games themselves. It didn’t clearly explain how we were looking at a nation that had arisen from the ashes of America in a dystopian future.

You learned or gleaned these pieces of understanding along the way. It felt like walking into a house that you’ve never visited before with many doors. Each one held a room full of details; some interesting, some bland.

I often want God to give me answers, or to make clear my future path and plans…but what he wants to do is let the story unfold. It’s a rich story with depth, not a book of quick answers and little left to wonder about.

The Bible itself isn’t a text book, it’s a grand narrative about God and the flawed people he loves.

In books, I never skip ahead to see what’s going to happen. It means less when you don’t know what it takes to get there. But in life, I’m constantly whining about wanting to know how it will all turn out. I think this would steal away from experience, the journey. And I think that life consists not of where we are, but how we got there.

Sometimes the story of our lives wanders and meanders, but that’s what gives it depth and breadth. The best stories take time to tell, and I want my life to be a great story.

Judgement in a Facebook World (or, What Would Jesus Post?)

Just because facebook gives us a glimpse into people’s lives doesn’t mean it also gives us the right to render judgement upon it. That’s the job of people in their lives at the local faith community level. What does the Bible say about Judgement?

It says not to judge hypocritically. It says believers should not judge those outside the church. It says judgement should be handled at the local church level through appropriate authority. It says judgment between Christians should not be put on display before non-believers.

The bible says that if you see another believer sinning, you should confront them.  So if somebody who identifies themselves as a Christian puts some seriously questionable material or comments up on their Facebook page, do we have the option and/or the obligation to confront that person?

Does Matthew 18 now involve the guidance to ‘first private message that person, and if they don’t respond then confront them on their wall’?

Rendering judgment upon people in Facebook just seems like a very dangerous precedent to me. I’m not entirely sure you can avoid hypocritical judgment when telling people what you think about their content on facebook. And are arguments between Christians really the thing you want their non-believing friends to see? You’re probably going to end up re-enforcing stereotypes that won’t lead anybody to spiritual life - that Christians are judgmental, nosy, and holier than thou.

I think we who are not in a place to interact offline with people should restrain ourselves to encouragement where possible. If you want to get into a conversation about whether you agree with somebody’s stance on gay marriage or abortion, that may be fine. But if you know that it will devolve into arguing, perhaps it would be best to restrict yourself.

Better, I think, to avoid those kinds of topics unless they can be discussed on a personal level, with a friend rather than a person who we kind of know and never see in real life.

I believe we as Christians should view Facebook and the social world not as a place where we should bring a ruler to rap the knuckles of others, but as a chance to encourage and uplift through affirmation. If Jesus had a Facebook page, I just don’t think he’d be interested in flaming people with it. It would be a place people would go so that they could be part of something great and good.

The Difference Between Having Faith and Being Delusional

Recently, I’ve been asking God and asking myself where the line is between faith and stupid. When do I stop being a man of faith and become a lunatic?

When a man absolutely convinces himself (and others) that God has showed him that the world will end on a certain date, then the date passes, we see the obvious conclusion that he was a wacko.

But didn’t he think he was having faith? Dismissing any doubts that God had revealed something to him - is that not what the life of faith is about?

So I have been trying to determine how to believe things that God says in the scriptures, even when there may be apparent evidence to the contrary, without crossing the line to being delusional.

One, clearly wrong, answer is to abandon faith. That’s the other end of the spectrum from becoming delusional. Becoming a stark realist. I refuse to end up there. We serve a supernatural God who does provide and fulfill promises. A God who calls things that are not as though they were (Romans 4:17).

The scriptures extol us repeatedly to have faith:

We live by faith, not by sight (2 Corinthians 5:7)

And without faith it is impossible to please God… (Hebrews 11:6)

You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, so that the Son can bring glory to the Father. (John 14:13)

“…if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”(Matthew 17:20)

So a life that is devoid of faith is not an option, but rather a less than desirable condition. So what, then? How do we arrive at a place where we have faith, but aren’t crushed when somebody at church we prayed for dies from cancer? When we’ve been asking for God to do something in our lives, but nothing seems to change?

This is when I recalled Jesus’ admonition to have faith like that of a child (see Luke 18:17).

My kids believe me when I tell them things. That doesn’t make my children delusional. It just means that they trust me. They accept the things I tell them without being skeptical or critical. They know that, as an adult, I know more things than they know. So if I say something, they take it at face value.

I think maybe that’s how I’m supposed to have faith in God. He knows more that I do. He has my best interest in mind.

If I, being totally imperfect, do my best to instruct my children and show them the right way to live and the best way to accomplish things in life, how much more will God be able to accomplish the same in the lives of his children?

I don’t know why sometimes I can’t seem to get the results in prayer that Jesus told me to expect. But rather than getting mad or resentful at God, I’m just taking the approach of saying ‘I guess I’m not doing it quite right’, and I’m trying to continue learning from my Father in Heaven - the way a child does.

Faith and Works

I was reading the book of James yesterday when I came across 2:22: “Faith is made complete by what you do.”

I imagine that Sunday morning worship services are kind of like being in a locker room with your basketball team before a game. You know what’s in the playbook/Bible because you’ve studied it. You’ve worked on your game/life. It isn’t perfect, but perfection isn’t the point right now. The point is to go out and perform as best you can. The Coach/Pastor gives you a spirited pep talk. Finally the doors open.

Do you get out there and play with every ounce of strength you’ve got? Are you part of a team effort to be victorious? Or do you slip off into the crowd, only returning for the next pep talk in the locker room?

Basketball players aren’t judged on their intentions. They aren’t judged on how excited they get in the locker room. Fans don’t care how well they know the playbook. They just care about seeing their team win.

We in evangelical Christianity are very weary of works-based salvation theology. It’s good to realize that every time you do something sacrificial or loving, you’re not getting an extra crown in heaven, or an extra room on your mansion. But if we just become hoarders of God’s love and grace while the rest of the world goes to hell in a hand basket, we’ve committed an even greater error.

Here’s the thing about the guys who win in the NBA: only the guys who put in the time and effort to be great get there. Guys like Kobe and LeBron and Kevin Durant, they put in more hours of work than their competitors. A guy like Allen Iverson, who famously mocked practice? I guarantee you he played more pick-up ball than you could believe. Talent is essential, but everybody in the NBA has talent. The question is whether you work to maximize that talent. Fans may not care about how much time and energy a player spends on practice and working out, but they sometimes forget that those are the very things that created the winner they love.

In Christianity, rather than talent, we can say that we all have the Holy Spirit living within us. But that if you don’t maximize your relationship with God, you’ll probably just end up being another bench warmer. The pews already have plenty of butts in them. What we need is more people who are seeking ways toact on their faith.

A basketball player with talent is incomplete. It will take hours of time, pounds of sweat and disciplined effort to become a champion.

A Christian with faith is incomplete. Because faith is made complete by what you do.

Spiritual Superstars

When I was in little league baseball as a child, there were certain kids who were far and away the best players in the league. Usually, they were bigger, stronger and faster than the vast majority of the rest of us. It was easy to look up to these players, and to envy their prowess. But something funny happened. By the time I was Captain of the Varsity team in High School, playing American Legion ball (a step up from Varsity) and being recruited by colleges, none of those guys were around anymore. Many of them didn’t play, and those that did were simply ordinary.

What happened was that, while they had physically developed a little faster and gained an edge, the rest of us caught up. They didn’t have to work hard to succeed as kids, it came naturally because of their advantage. The rest of us had to work hard to find ways to compete with them. By the time we caught up physically, we now had more tools in our repertoire to go along with the physical abilities. They didn’t develop those tricks and tactics, so they no longer held any advantage.

I read a book called Seal Team Six a while back that talked about this issue. The guy who wrote the book mentions the fact that many of the All American football players who enter training drop out the fastest. They’re not used to having a situation where their superior physical talent can’t get them through. But the guys who are used to having to scrap and fight to keep up have what it really takes: a never say die attitude.

I like to run adventure races like the Tough Mudder. The only way you finish a race like that is to have the attitude of “Screw this race, I’m gonna finish if it kills me.” I know they’re going to throw really tough obstacles at me over and over and over again. My approach is to get by each one when I come to it, no matter what.

I do these races to find my limits, and then push beyond them. To become something greater than I am.

When you see people who are your same age that seem to have it all together while you’re struggling not to fall apart, don’t get down on yourself. Realize that you’re getting stronger. You’re learning how to handle adversity. You’re gaining wisdom and perspective that will help you in future situations.

There’s no need to be angry at people who seem to have it easy. God knows what is coming toward each of us in this life, and he knows when and how to prepare each of us.

The goal God has given us isn’t to look better than everybody else, to look like we have it all together. The goal is to fight the good fight, to run the good race. To keep the faith, and receive the reward that he will give us when all has been said and done.

Don’t try to be a Spiritual Superstar. Be a Spiritual Tough Mudder.

Balaam: A Study of God's Interaction with the "Un-Chosen"

I find the story of Balaam (primarily in Numbers 22-24) to be insanely interesting. If you’re not already familiar with the story, I’d recommend you read it before you continue with what I wrote.

Here’s what grabs me: Balaam is an outsider, yet he really is a prophet of the Lord. Not a false prophet. Not a diviner, using spiritually shady tactics. A prophet of the Lord.

God’s chosen people are the Israelites. He has given no promises or covenants or guarantees to the people who have not descended from Abraham, other than a vow not to flood the earth again. He doesn’t have any obligation to speak with somebody like Balaam, yet he does anyways.

Several times in this narrative, the scriptures clearly say that God comes to Balaam and talks to him. (22:9-12, 22:20, 22:32-35, 23:4, 23:16, 24:2)

And what’s more, Balaam is obedient to God. Until God gives him permission to go with the messengers, he won’t do it. He repeatedly says that he will only say the things that God puts in his mouth, and backs it up by doing exactly that.

Now, in the end, Balaam ends up working to bring destruction upon Israel. He tells the king of Moab to entice Israel to sin through idolatry and sexual immorality. It leads to a plague in Israel and the death of Balaam himself as repayment.

But in this story, we see that God is working outside of his chosen people. A guy with no connections to Israel at all is using his God given gifts to make a living, blessing and cursing people - and he’s successful, according to the king of Moab (v. 6)

I wonder - where and how is the Holy Spirit moving in the world today outside of Christianity?  Are there people who speak God’s truth without perhaps being fully aware of it?

Do some musicians and artists and poets and movie-makers create artistic expressions with the inspiration of the Holy Spirit despite only a desire to make a living?

Does God spread his truth and his life into places that we would least expect?

As Balaam himself comes to ruin through his self serving ways, perhaps God’s blessing does not guarantee that someone will lead a life that directly contributes to his kingdom, regardless of their gifts or calling.

The more we try to put boundaries around God, the more he seems to ignore them. The more we try to simplify him to a reliable formula, the more variables we find in him.

I wonder if we can find the places that God is moving in our schools, neighborhoods or workplaces and become a part of his work, rather than viewing ourselves as the only possible conduit for God’s ministry. Joining with a charity or outreach that isn’t “Christian”. Getting involved with an artistic collaborative (a band, or a play troupe, etc). Joining a discussion group centered on literature. These are just some possible ways we can place ourselves in areas that God may already be speaking - shockingly - without any outside help.

Perhaps that is what Jesus is talking about when he speaks of fields ripe for harvest. That God causes growth to occur, and we are simply called to point that out.

The Snake Pit

“Then the Lord sent venomous snakes among them; they bit the people and many Israelites died. The people came to Moses and said, “We sinned when we spoke against the Lord and against you. Pray that the Lord will take the snakes away from us.” So Moses prayed for the people. The Lord said to Moses, “Make a snake and put it up on a pole; anyone who is bitten can look at it and live.” So Moses made a bronze snake and put it up on a pole. Then when anyone was bitten by a snake and looked at the bronze snake, he lived.”

Numbers 21:6-9

So Israel screws up (again) and as a result, God’s hand of blessing and protection are removed long enough to result in an epidemic of snakes infiltrating the area where they live. The snakes lead Israel to repentance, and with that repentance they make a request: they want Moses to ask God to take away the snakes.

But God didn’t take away the snakes. People still got bit. They still had to have their guard up. However, God did provide a means of deliverance from total destruction. If they trusted in God enough to look to the solution he provided, they wouldn’t die.

I think we often pray and ask God to take away sin and temptation from our lives. We often pray that God would remove challenges and difficult circumstances.

But sometimes, that isn’t his plan. We still get bitten, we still have to deal with dangers lurking around us. Sin still stalks us through the corridors of life.

We can choose whether to let it destroy us completely, or to look to the solution God provided: his Messiah that hung suspended between heaven and earth on the cross. In looking to him, we find that we are allowed to live and not die. We are delivered from that things that would normally destroy us.

I sometimes wish that God would just take away the snakes and let me live a life of comfort and peace. But I don’t get a vote. So I am left with two choices: look to cross and receive life or spite myself by ignoring him.

I hate being snakebit. I don’t like having to deal with the brokenness of myself and others on a daily basis. But I’m deeply grateful that God has heard the cry for forgiveness that has gone up to him out of the wilderness of this world and responded with salvation.

Heaven's Perfection

In Brooklyn, New York, there is a school for children with learning disabilities called Chush. A few years ago, a father of one of the students, Shaya, spoke at a fundraising dinner for the school. He began mildly enough, thanking this person and that person. Then he startled everyone with an anguished question: “Where is the perfection in my son, Shaya? Everything done in heaven is done with perfection. But my child cannot understand things as other children do…Where is the perfection in that?” The guests sat silent.

“I believe,” the man continued, “that when heaven brings a child like this into the world, the perfection it seeks is in the way people react to this child.”

He then told a story. One day he and Shaya were watching some boys play softball. Shaya wanted to play, and the father went over and spoke with the pitcher of one of the teams. The boy was at first unsure. Then he shrugged and said, “Whatever. We’re in the eighth inning and behind by six runs. We’ve got nothing to lose. Sure. He can play short center field. We’ll let him bat in the ninth.”

Shaya was ecstatic. He shambled out to his position and stood there.

But by the bottom of the ninth, his team had fallen behind by two points and had the bases loaded. They needed a home run to make it work - only, Shaya was scheduled to bat. The boys conferred, and to the father’s amazement they handed the bat to Shaya. He stood over the base, clutching the bat askew, too tight. The pitcher from the opposing team then did a remarkable thing: he took several steps closer and lobbed an easy ball right over the plate. Shaya swung wildly and missed wildly. One of his teammates came up and wrapped his arms around Shaya from behind, and together they held the bat. The pitcher lobbed another easy ball, and Shaya and his teammate bunted it. It rolled right to the pitcher. All the players shouted for Shaya to run to first. He shuffled along. The pitcher could have had an easy out, but he threw the ball wide and far to left field. Shaya made first base. The players yelled for him to take second. Again, the catcher in left field threw wide and far, and Shaya made second. On it went, the other players all making home plate, Shaya loping along and everyone from both sides screaming themselves hoarse for him to run all the way. He touched home plate, and the ball came singing in behind him. The boys cheered madly. They mounted Shaya on their shoulders and paraded him as a hero.

“That day,” the father said, “Those eighteen boys reached their level of heaven’s perfection.”

_________________________________________________

Excerpted from Hidden In Plain Sight by Mark Buchanan

Salvation: An Ongoing Process

Recently, I read the portion of scripture below: “Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God’s wrath through him! For if, when we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life! Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” (Romans 5:9-11 emphasis mine)

We tend to focus on the death of Jesus. He died for our sins. Then we celebrate Easter and shortly after that, he goes directly to heaven. Are we forgetting that Jesus didn’t just die for us, but that he also lived for us?

His sacrifice wiped the slate clean, restored us to zero when we had been at negative one zillion. But the goal isn’t to stay at zero. It’s to start counting up. To build on the second chance, to seize the opportunity.

Accepting Jesus’ sacrifice isn’t the finish line we often treat it as being: “Accept Jesus and you’ll end up in heaven”. It’s a beginning.

When God found you, you were laying in a roadside ditch - crippled and unable to help yourself. He picked you up and healed your legs. The worst thing you can do now is sit back down and wait for the end of your life. It’s time to start using the legs he healed. To go on the journey that he’s been calling you toward all along.

That journey is about restoring this world, not escaping it. To be part of his movement to make all things new. To bring light to the darkness, hope to the despairing, freedom to captives.

If you’ve accepted Jesus death as payment for your sins, then I want to say ‘Congratulations, welcome to the family. We’ve got a lot of work to do, so roll up your sleeves and let’s get busy.’

The Only Thing That Counts

So check out what I found in the Bible yesterday: Paul is talking to the church in Galatia about how you can’t earn God’s favor.

Sometimes, I feel like my life isn’t perfect because I’m either doing something wrong, or there’s something I’m not doing, or there’s some spiritual secret I haven’t grasped yet.

But I have to remind myself that even if I one day got it all together and became perfect from that moment forward, God wouldn’t owe me a dang thing.

If I act super spiritual for a week, God isn’t up in heaven saying, “well, I guess I have to give him that thing he’s been asking for now.”

If I’m going to let God utilize me, it’s going to be the imperfect version of my that exists now and always will exist.

This is what Paul is trying to hammer home to the Galatians: stop trying to make yourself perfect for God. When you make him part of your life, you become perfect in him.

And that’s when Paul says this:

“The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love.” (Galatians 5:6)

Bang.

That’s God’s grading rubric. Did your belief in God lead you to undertake actions based on love?

I think I subconsciously keep a running score on my own Christianity that’s based on how well I’ve avoided sin and done the ‘holy’ things: praying, reading the bible, etc.

I’m not saying that avoiding sin and praying and reading scripture is bad or worthless; I’m saying that’s not what God is primarily after. Those things will come out of a life of faith expressing itself through love.

The best results come when you’re doing things the right way, not when you’re trying to make the outcome look good.

Hope and Fear

Have you ever been to the place where hope and fear are wrestling for control of your emotions? I’ve been living at that intersection for a while now.

I’ve been waiting on the opportunity to begin working at a job that has more meaning for me than the corporate job I’ve been at for a number of years. “Waiting” may not be the best word here. “Frantically trying to find something else but not being able to force anything to happen” would probably be better.

Yesterday, I was at a really low point. I felt like everything within me was driving over the cliff of depression and anger and frustration.

Somebody on my twitter feed put up a quote by a character on The Wire that said: ”A life, Jimmy. You know what that is? It’s the [stuff] that happens while you’re waiting for moments that never come.”

I felt like my life was a prison sentence to mundane mediocrity. I wanted somebody to blame for the fact that my life isn’t the fairy tale that I’d like it to be, and God is an easy punching bag.

He’s all powerful, so anything that goes wrong is his fault! As these thoughts kept filling my head, I realized how childish I was being. I also recognized the voice of the enemy, telling me to ‘Curse God and die’.

I apologized to God for being immature and I worshiped him. I thanked him. I asked for help and mercy.

On the way home, a thought came to me. “Hope deferred makes the heart sick.” I knew it was scripture, so I looked it up. It’s Proverbs 13:12.

“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a dream fulfilled is a tree of life.”

Eugene Peterson, in The Message puts it like this:

“Unrelenting disappointment leaves you heartsick, but a sudden good break can turn life around.”

I had no idea why the Holy Spirit was telling me this. I have been living in a place of unrelenting disappointment for many months. I knew I was heart sick. For God to confirm, ‘look, I know that being in a depressing rut for a long time will really hurt you’ didn’t make me feel any better.

Heck, I had been chastising myself for wanting something better. “God has me here, so I need to learn to be okay with it. I need to learn how to be content in the midst of frustration” was my attitude. But the Bible said something completely different. Constant frustration will make your heart sick. You need fulfilled dreams to be happy. This sounds more like something Barbie would say in one of my daughters cartoons than what we expect from the Bible.

Yet here was the Holy Spirit, bringing this very thing to mind.

Later that evening, I got some really good news. Not good enough to let me quit my job immediately, but good news. A door opening really wide.

I have felt like a plant that was in a too small pot and not getting any water or sunlight, and this news felt like water and sunlight. I believe the day is coming soon when I’ll be moved to a bigger pot so I can begin to grow into the tree God wants me to be.

I’m deeply grateful to serve a God who cares about me, even though he doesn’t owe me anything.  A God who knows how much we need hope, and showed up yesterday after my time of testing to give me what I haven’t earned.

Weakness and Strength

In 2 Corinthians 12, Paul talks about his health situation. You know, when he has a “thorn in his flesh”, and he asks God to take it away. But God refuses Paul’s request. Instead, God tells him, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” (verse 9) We talk about this a lot in Christianity. That in our weakness, God is strong. I was on a retreat around this time last year, finishing my degree at Regent University and we were having a group discussion. One of the girls in my class asked, “Can God work through a weakness without it becoming a strength?”

I thought it was an interesting question. I have had many areas of weakness that God has transformed into a strength. God does that kind of thing all the time, I think - If we let him.

But what about working in a weakness, where the weakness never becomes a strength?

I told her about my autistic daughter, Elle. God has used her to speak to many people, not least of all myself and my wife, yet her disability still exists. In the difficult struggles we’ve had with her, God’s grace has been all the more abundant. Grace to handle the trials, and to press forward in her treatment and development.

God hasn’t ‘fixed’ the situation, but he’s been present to meet the needs which have arisen out of it.

We know, from reading the Bible, that God is making all things new. He’s busy setting things right. That started with Jesus’ sacrifice and it will be set to completion when he returns. There will be a new heaven and a new earth, a perfect reality.

But here and now, there is still brokeness. The Fall still echos in us and in all of creation. We have been called to work among the imperfection. And while we are partners with setting things right, sometimes what we have to work with the brokeness before it has been fixed.

I will never be perfect on this earth, yet God chooses to work in me and through me. I am weakness personified, yet God has no plan B. Though I am still flawed and imperfect and fallen, God’s glory comes through when I let it.

Instead of throwing away this world and all that is in it, it seems like he’s taking all the loose threads and weaving a beautiful tapestry. He shows his greatnessbecause he uses the broken, the imperfect, the flawed. There is no such thing as a person who isn’t good enough for God. Because the weaker we are, the more we recognize we need him, and the more he shows up.

It’s only when we get a fat head, thinking God owes us a debt of gratitude that we end up full of ourselves and bereft of his presence.

Let us all, as Paul says boast only in what the Lord has done.

The Complete Christian: An Oxymoron

I’ve heard people use the phrase ‘complete Christian’. He or she is a complete Christian. The idea being that they’ve put it all together and they are as close to being Jesus as they can possibly be. Personally, I think this is kind of silly. Paul, in 1 Corinthians 12 talks about how we are all parts of the same body. If I’m a toe, I may be the best toe that ever lived, but I’m still just a toe. I’m not a complete body. I can’t set off and do great things on my own.

I wonder what your Christianity looks like. I’m sure it has some things in common with my Christianity, but I hope it isn’t exactly the same. I say that, because I know I don’t have it all figured out.

I believe we’ve made Christianity the art/science of ‘having all the truth’ or ‘being right about everything’, when in reality, it’s designed to be a seekingafter the truth.

We’ve made it a destination, when it has always been a journey.

‘Christian’ isn’t something you are as much as it is always something you are striving to be.  The word Christian was originally a pejorative term meaning ‘Little Christs’.

God wants us to seek him, he says this repeatedly in the scriptures, and it’s pretty clear that while we won’t fully discover him on this side of eternity, we’re supposed to keep looking.

When we stop looking, we stop finding.

We seem to fear people coming to different conclusions within the same church - we think that having different conclusions will lead to division and church splits, so toeing the line becomes all important.

As a youth minister, one of my primary goals is not to teach my teens what to think, but rather how to think. I’d rather my kids find out what it is they actually believe instead of having me tell them what I want them to believe…and I believe that kind of attitude leaves room for the Holy Spirit to work!

This is my Christianity. Get your own.

Getting People To Buy Into Lies

If you want people to believe a lie, make it something that they want to believe. Something that makes their life easier. Here’s some good examples:

• You can lose weight by taking a pill.
• You can get rich quick on the internet by only working a few hours per week.
• You just have to go to church to make God happy.
• Evangelism is just warning people that they’re going to hell.

People want results without having to invest the time, energy, and discipline it actually takes. So if you just promise to give results without work, people will flock to it!

If there was a pill that actually kept you think and gave you ripped abs, don’t you think everybody would take it? Of course! So the fact that not everybody is thin and has ripped abs tells you there is no such pill, right? And yet if you watch TV for an hour, you’ll probably see at least 3 commercials advertising products that make getting in shape seem simple, quick and effortless.

When people want results without investment, they are willing to ignore the reality all around them that shouts the truth. They buy into the lie because it’s more attractive.

Losing weight is going to mean eating differently, eating less and working out more.

Getting rich (if that’s even a good thing) will require time, energy, effort and taking risks.

Jesus didn’t say anything about ‘going to church’ making up the Christian faith. He did mention something about ‘take up your cross and follow me’ (Luke 9:23)

Evangelism requires you to live a life that bears witness to God, not just spout words that do.

But all these things are tough. They can’t be easily checked off a checklist and forgotten about.

So write a book about how living for God will make everyday like the weekend. Or how if you pray a certain prayer from the Old Testament, God doesn’t have any choice but to give you what you want. They love that kind of stuff.

None of that will help foment a Christianity that actually makes a difference in this world; that works to restore this world to the perfection it had when God created it, but hey - we can’t have easy and get results. But we can keep telling people they can!

God of the Meek and Lowly

Leviticus 12 talks about the sacrifice an Israelite woman is supposed to make at the temple after having a child. It says that she should sacrifice a year old lamb, or if she can’t afford a lamb, a pigeon or a dove instead. Fast forward to Luke 2: Mary has just given birth to Jesus. The bible tells us that when Joseph and Mary take the child to the temple in order to present him to the Lord, they brought along two birds (v. 24).

I find it very meaningful that God himself stipulated what he preferred (a lamb), but made allowances for those who simply couldn’t afford it. And when he himself came to walk upon the earth, he chose for his family people who couldn’t afford “the best”.

God isn’t trying to hob nob with the rich. He’s not attempting to get money out of them. God doesn’t look at Warren Buffett or Bill Gates and really wish they’d share some of what they have with him.

When God gave the greatest gift that would ever appear on this earth, it was given to people who couldn’t even afford a lamb. He came to a meek and lowly couple that were willing to listen and obey God.

God’s not looking for what he can get out of you. He’s looking to see whether you’re making a place for him in your life. Money can’t buy that. Only a humble devotion to the creator can.

Christian Love

The Roman Emperor Julian (332-363) hated Christianity. He hoped instead to restore the glory of the ancient Roman religion, which worshipped a multitude of deities in the temples and shrines that filled the city.

But Julian saw a problem with convincing the multitude to turn its back on the recently authorized faith: the power of Christian love in practice.

Here’s how he said it: “[Christianity] has been specifically advanced through the loving service rendered to strangers…[The Christians] care not only for their own poor but for ours as well; while those who belong to us look in vain for the help that we should render them.”

In other words, how could a pagan religion hope to gain followers when Christianity is setting itself apart as being far superior through its actions and results?

My how things change.

Is there anybody who looks at American Christianity and thinks first and foremost of the charity it carries out? Of the kindness it shows to the poor and destitute?

It’s far more likely they’ll think of Christianity as being a group of people who want power through politics, don’t like homosexuals and think kids need to be sheltered from secular music and movies or even education.

Who in their right mind would want any part of that? I know I don’t.

Those of us who really love God would say that’s just junk you have to ignore when you’re trying to be a part of the Body of Christ. But from the outside looking in, how can you know that the loudmouth politician, television preachers and bully pulpit pastors don’t speak for everyone?

Instead of gaining clout through the methods of this world: coersion, marketing, spin control, PR campaigns, etc…can we try the method Jesus recommended? Leading through serving?

The whole point of washing the disciples feet in John 13 was to show them that Christians were expected to act differently. Embracing service rather than power.

When Paul talks about living lives that no government could outlaw (Galatians 5:23), he’s again hammering this point home.

Instead of trying to grab power and attention from the politicians and the wealthy, lets serve the poor and powerless.

Let’s give people an alternative to what they see happening in a broken world, not more of the same.

Then, perhaps, some people may begin to say “There is something different about Christians. Something better than what I have going on.” This, I believe, is the example Jesus gave us and the mission we should be undertaking.

The Sheep and the Wolves

We in Christianity love to talk about being ‘more than conquerors’ and being members of God’s victorious army. But in Matthew 10:16, Jesus says something that I think I need to keep in mind.

As he’s commissioning his followers to travel to nearby towns and preach the good news about the coming of God’s kingdom, he says this to them: “Look, I am sending you out as sheep among wolves…”

We are called to preach a Gospel of peace in a violent world.

To share a message of self denial to a hedonistic civilization.

Challenged to bring words of life into a culture of death.

There are people who will reject light in favor of darkness, who will view the news of God’s love as weakness.  Yet it is not our job to destroy such people.

We must not become God’s wolves in our drive to expand his kingdom. The crusaders who took up arms and the street corner preacher who damns his listeners to an eternity of suffering have missed the point.

As Martin Luther King Jr. said, “Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.”

Our mission is to be about the restoration of all things, to help return them to their original design. It is meaningful to hear the clarion call of Isaiah in 11:6 where he foresees a time when “The wolf will live with the lamb”.

We will not conquer this world. That is the work of the Lord himself, and he has guaranteed that it will occur. It is our job to be innocent of the ways of this world, that everyone would know that there is another way: To trust in a shepherd instead of relying on that which we can take for ourselves through force and violence.

God is not looking for wolves. He is looking for those who seek to emulate his son, the Lamb who was slain.